We all know the Golden Rule - Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Recent research is saying it a bit differently – Treat yourself the way you’d want others to treat you, or to say it in a similar way, Do unto yourself as you would have others do unto you.  This is referred to as self-compassion, and it has been defined as:

1. The importance of being understanding rather than self-judgmental.  Be kind to yourself in the same way you want others to be kind to you. 
2. Learning to frame personal experience in light of a shared human experience.  When we act kindly toward ourselves, then we are able to feel connected to others in our suffering or in our failures.
3. Developing a high level of self-awareness.  You have to be aware of your sufferings and struggles in order to be compassionate to yourself in the midst of those sufferings and struggles.

It seems, thinking Biblically about the concept of “self-compassion,” that our awareness of God’s love for us enables us and tells us to love others and love self.  Maybe a different term needs to be used to describe this.  Rather than self-compassion, maybe we can call this “complete compassion.”  Then our descriptive phrase can be, Do unto yourself and others as you would have them do unto you, and do this in response to the love and grace God has shown and given you.  I think that is a more “complete” understanding of “compassion.”  In other words, our love of self and others is not a desperate effort to generate meaning or value to life, nor an attempt to get God to love us.  Rather, loving self and others is the product of being loved by the Creator.  Love of self and others is a response of gratitude to God.

Whether you believe in a Creator or not, what is evident is that relationships are fundamental to life, and a love relationship with family and friends is vital to our quality of life.  Our relational health and our mental health do better in a climate of compassion.  All I am really saying in this blog is that compassion toward others and toward self is really important.  And I am adding the idea that for people who believe in God, compassion toward self and others is a response to being loved by God.

Do unto yourself and others as you would have them do unto you, and do this in response to the love and grace God has shown and given you.  Complete compassion…